Dear Marcie,

You gotta read the labels. You know those warnings on products? May cause blindness, cancer or terminal acne.

Guys come with labels. You need to learn how to read them. They aren’t printed on their foreheads (but that would make it easier). But they do give you warning signs. Losers have labels, but you have to look for them. You have to be willing to read them. And you have to have the courage to act on it and don’t pretend that a frog is a prince. Or worse, that you can ‘reform’ the bad boy. Always a bad call.

So what are the loser labels?

1. Control Freak – if he insists on calling the shots all the time and is trying to manipulate your life, drop him like a hot potato. It’s not infatuation it’s obsession and it’s not healthy.

2. Anger Management Flunky – if he gets easily ticked off or violent, avoid him like poison ivy.

3. Player – if he has a rep of being a ‘ladies man’ (whether or not he has Courvoisier!) you’re gonna be played if you fall for him. You aren’t someone to connect with in his eyes, you are someone to conquer. Hit delete – end game with Player.

4. Porn Star – if the dude is all wrapped up in sleazy movies, videos, lusty jokes and dresses provocatively he could be working up a real sex addiction. Hint: if he has a “Porn Star” window sticker on his car, steer clear.

5. Mirror Man –if the dude is always checking himself in the mirror, directs the conversation to himself and doesn’t ask much about you, he is a narcissist. He’s in love alright – with himself! Don’t stand between him and himself.  

6. Eternal Victim – this guy is always in need of a girl to fix him, be there for him, keep him from falling into a pit of despair, and by the way, “Can you loan me twenty dollars?” You are not a nurse. You are not a social worker. This guy is a project; dump him.

Lose the losers,
Jeremy